JAY

Drums

Jay learned to play drums from his forefathers, none of whom have been alive for hundreds of years. His unique technique can only be described as mixing brownie batter with a toilet brush after drinking a bottle of Goldschlager with a shot of au jus. When he was a child, Jay became the inspiration for Nickelodeon's "Blue's Clues," as he marked everything with a hand print, since he is unable to write. Every Wednesday night at approximately 7:07 PM, Jay takes himself for a walk (leash included), scratches a few lamp posts, bites a tree or two, waters a hydrant and heads home to bed. It is rumored Jay landed the job as Eclipse drummer by stowing away in a bass drum case, even while the drum itself was in the case.

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